Affective Needs Teacher

Affective Needs Teacher
            This year I accepted a job as an affective needs teacher. (Wait while I draw a deep breath)
This has not been a successful teaching year. I read a book called “Angry Young Men” by Aaron Kipnis, PhD., and I kind of understand why I haven’t been successful. 
            There are many reasons and while I would like to say that none of them are because of me, it just wouldn’t be true. I am not a male.  I am not a lot of things, but an affective needs teacher must be in touch with who and what kind of person you really are and not what you would like to be.  The core beliefs that are needed are cookie cutter, but they must be your own without any apologies.  The moral fiber has to be intact in your soul and confident in yourself. I am a white woman.
            I thought the main reason behind this was because these kids were street smart and could smell bull poopy and mile off.  This is true. However, I am coming off a bad year and I am trying to get my confidence back.  These kids on the other had have been through a lot and based on what I read in this book. The root cause is both nature and nurture.  The children have been born to young parents and were either preemies and/or had some form of fetal alcohol syndrome.  Since then, they have been part of an abusive home life, been in foster homes, and either don’t have a father figure or have an abusive father figure at home.
            As I read the book, I realized that all of my students have experienced all of the items a din some ways are on the seven pathways that lead to jail.  The sad part is that I am part of the pathway that leads to prison, not jail, not juvenile hall, and not an institution, prison. Dr. Kipnis is one of these angry young men.  However, he stats that he has had the help that he recommends in this book for boys who are on their way to become an angry young man.  What is really sad is that there is not one type, except to say is that they they are all boys.

            I read this book as part of a freelancing gig I accepted.  I will be reading it over again because I skimmed over most of it because of my time limit.  This helped me to understand why this has been and unmitigated mess. I highly recommend this book to anyone who works with boys, especially boys who are at risk.

Why I like my Scars !

Why I like my scars!
A scar is a mark left on the skin after a surface injury or wound has healed. 2. A lingering sign of
damage or injury, either emotional, mental or physical. (
I’ll be honest the picture isn’t me.  I do have a scar in that general area and if I open my shirt for the world to see, you will a few scars. One scar is from the portal I had inserted in order to make it easier for the medical personal to draw blood, insert medicine and attach my chemo lines.  The next scar goes from the center of my chest to under my arm. Go a little further down and there are my stretch marks from two pregnancies, scar from a C-section and epidural cut.

            On the back of my hands and wrist are scars from a student I held in a restraint who scratched very deeply. My arms and legs are covered with scars from various childhood, teenage and adult injuries. Some are long, some are narrow, some white, some are so old that only I can see them. Finally, some I don’t look at because those scars go all the way to my heart and soul.
From now on let no one trouble me [by making it necessary for me to justify my authority as an apostle, and the absolute truth of the gospel], for I bear on my body the branding-marks of Jesus [the wounds, scars, and other outward evidence of persecutions—these testify to His ownership of me].
These physical scars are the result of life happening to me.  The scars are the reminders of a high risk pregnancy, a scary first pregnancy, a trip when I was hurt the most and scared I wouldn’t live through it.  These are my branding marks of Jesus; they testify to Jesus’ ownership of me. A time to remember that no mater what, God was there and put a hedge of protection around me and I am here to testify to that.
                                            There are mental scars:
·      You won’t pass the test, you aren’t smart enough
·      You are a basic teacher; we won’t be renewing your contract.
·      We don’t want you teaching anymore in that class
·      The writing, well, it isn’t up to our standards
The emotional scars:
·      I hate you, I wish you weren’t my mother
·      I wish you were dead
·      Don’t talk to me, you are . . ..
·      The friends who no longer are or will become . . .
                           because the scar is just to fresh from the last time
The scars that can’t be seen are the ones that hurt the most.  
When I look back at them I see how God stitched the wounds together that those words, situations, experiences produced. I wish I could say that I just moved on and they don’t hurt anymore, but no.
You see I have to forgive the person who said it, forgive the situation that caused it and forgive the person I was at the time.  That is the hardest part, but each time, I can forgive because I know that there is a great purpose> Not my will by your will God

Then Satan comes along and replays the situation in my head, whispering remember.
                        Then God brings me to another situation that is more hurtful and I remember that the                                                                                                        test isn’t over yet. 


Trust in and rely confidently on the Lord with all your heart And do not rely on your own insight or understanding. In all your ways know and acknowledge and recognize Him, And He will make your paths straight and smooth [removing obstacles that block your way].

We are in a spiritual warfare, the past is over and God is fighting behind the scene:

For though we walk in the flesh [as mortal men], we are not carrying on our [spiritualwarfare according to the flesh and using the weapons of man.
The scars?  
           The Emotional, Physical, Mental ones?  

They remind us that God brought us through once and he will bring us through again.

When You Have Done Everything You Can?

Exodus 14:14New International Version (NIV)

s14 The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still.”

I am so tired, hurt, had it!!  Can you relate?  Have you been at the top and now you are on the bottom and our Father in heaven says you just need to do one thing; be still; be calm; wait on me.  The bills are more than you have in your bank account; your bank account is so low it doesn’t pay to look at it. The question mark behind this sentence reminds me and maybe you that you haven’t done everything you can, you haven’t been still.

In Proverbs 3:5 The Lord says:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;

Exodus 14:14

The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still

It is so hard to do nothing! To be still?

While I’m waiting I will serve You
While I’m waiting I will worship
While I’m waiting I will not faint
I’ll be running the race even while I wait

I will move ahead bold and confident
I’ll be taking every step in obedience, yeah

Songwriters  John Waller Iii

Nothing is said about the enemy; what is causing the pain; who is causing the pain; how unfair it is.  I have worked hard and now you want me to be still.wpid-wp-1432570750949.jpeg


We fail to understand that or forget to understand that we are in a spiritual battle; warfare that we need our armor in order to protect ourselves; None of the things I listed in the above sentence have anything to do with what is going on your life, because Satan has take aim and you not equipped to fight him.  You need to be still!

Have you done everything you can?  Be still

Praise ; serve; worship; pray and be still.praise.jpg

Be still and watch the bills coming in

Praise God that they will be paid.

Be still and watch your career be destroyed

Praise God that while this door will shut another one will open.

Be still and watch you bank account go into the red

Praise God that it will be returned double
Be still and wait while the Lord fights your battles.  The Lord allow these things to happen and while you wait and be still, watch Satan go away.  Watch and Worship while you wait for it to be over.

When you have done everything you can?  Remember God needs to be contacted first, last and in the middle.  Have you done everything you Can?  Praise, serve; worship; pray and Be still.

The fight is the Lord’s, not yours!!

Deuteronomy 1:43

  • New Living Translation

“This is what I told you, but you would not listen. Instead, you again rebelled against the Lord’s command and arrogantly went into the hill country to fight.

2 Chronicles 20:17

  • New Living Translation

But you will not even need to fight. Take your positions; then stand still and watch the Lord’s victory. He is with you, O people of Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid or discouraged. Go out against them tomorrow, for the Lord is with you!”


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